And suddenly, Youtube won't let me sign in

   I've spent a lot of time recently "watching" youtube videos of LetsPlay, subsection of RoosterTeeth and amazing group of video game playing idiots. THAT's my ideal job. They get paid to play those games. Also come up with show ideas and produce and edit them and stuff, but I don't watch those because I basically only like them for their idiocy and greatness not their actual content. I've also knitted a whole bunch and recently I've been just looking at all my Likes on tumblr. Like half of them are from Band of Brothers. 10% make me sad, and then the last 40% are just funny things I don't reblog because I'm not sure my friends would find them funny. Not that that ever stops me in other endeavors, but sometimes I just don't reblog the compilation of British people touching their nose and pointing because I need to hoard it forever.

In other news, whatever it is that I'm coughing up, it's gross and I do not approve. Don't get sick, boys and girls. Also, you know you've blown your nose too much recently when a kleenex with blood in it does not surprise you.

The let's play of Minecraft makes me want to play Minecraft though. Looks cool. Probably more fun with friends though, seeing how the parts I love are when they play pranks on each other. They built a house with lava in the ceiling so that when their friend removed an odd block the house filled with lava and burnt to the ground. Another house, they set up blocks of water in the ceiling so that when they flipped a switch the house flooded and it was great. And the entire city is built on top of layers of dynamite so randomly their whole place explodes.

I get passionate about things for temporary periods of time, and apparently these guys playing video games is my current obsession. It's a bit more manageable than the Band of Brothers one was, THEY'RE JUST SUCH GREAT BROS, IT MAKES ME WANT TO CALL THEM NAMES.

Can I stay unemployed forever? That sounds great. I don't want to work, sounds responsible and stuff. Though, if I don't get the one job I've applied for I'm going to probably freak out a bit because I haven't really thought about where else I want to work. I don't even know if I WANT to work there, I just know I need a job and it's not a bad place and stuff.

I got bored of knitting today and remembered that I want to get back to writing, but also I need to write thank yous for graduation and also there are tons of books I have started or have been meaning to read. I also enjoy sleeping. There isn't enough time for all this laziness. My only excuse for now is that I mostly feel like dying because breathing is hard and everything aches. The medicine that helps me feel better tastes like horrible horrible blueberries that are trying to poison me. Why does medicine always taste like it's trying to kill you?

I may genuinely be going insane

I watched an episode of Avatar: The Last Airbender, right, and then while I was waiting for the next one to load I started reading a Doctor Who book, the King's Dragon, and then when I went back to watching Avatar I was super confused as to why Amy and Rory were not there being sassy.

THEY'RE TOTALLY DIFFERENT TYPES OF MEDIA, I should be able to tell reading a book apart from watching a cartoon.

Oh, and I answered the phone many times today without telling you how scary it was.

This one lady called and asked for some dude whose name I do not know, and therefore he does not work there because I know everyone who works with me; most of them are related to me. I asked her to repeat the name, because I wanted to be sure, right, and then told her that there was no one there by that name and she possibly had the wrong number AND SHE GOT SO AFFRONTED WITH ME and was like "This is [Company where I am working], right?" and I was all, "let me connect you to Jane, hold please." All Jane did was assure her that no one by that name worked there and re-suggest that she had the wrong number.

Now I'm not so sure I used the word affronted properly in that paragraph. You know what I mean, even if the words are improperly used.

OK, I had a weird revelation about how writing things is like reading, only you get to create the entire world instead of borrow from someone else's, so then you can change it if something seems wrong, like a dream. I mean, it's obvious that's what writing is, but in terms of people writing fanfiction, they just want something in an existing fictional universe to have been written differently, or for there to be more of it, so they write it and it seems more true than if they just have a headcanon. But ALL writing is that, and that just amazes me.

I need to buy fruit and milk, but because those are the only two things on my grocery list, and technically I have milk, just I don't like it cause it's 2%, so I really only need fruit, and let's be honest, I don't really need fruit, looks like I'm not going to the store.

That was a run on sentence. It kind of bothers me, but instead of figuring out where it went downhill I'm just going to tell you that it is bad and assure you that if I was writing a paper I would've written that much better.

Oh, but I'm running low on Dr. Pepper, so I'll have to go to the store soon, don't worry.

RAM stands for Random Access Memory

Not for Random Ass Memories.

See, a widget on my PC is a CPU monitor thing and there's thing for RAM: Random Access Memory, but I was like, random-ass memory?

I can't sleep.

What is the world coming to? When I, queen of sleeping, cannot sleep for any amount of time, the world must be ending.

So I don't feel well, and it's all my fault, what of it?

My heart hurts and my stomach hurts and my head hurts. WHAT, ARE YOU SAYING I SHOULD GO TO BED AND GET SLEEP? WHAT?

I am working on a paper thing. Don't know why, it's not long or overdue, it's just now is the time to finish this up for some reason.

I watched 101 Dalmations. That was fun.

I kind of want to go to bed, but it's so tall, and I also am like, but, I could just write this and then it'd be done.

BUT THEN, I remembered fucking Thursday, and how I have a test taht I'm going to fail and how C is due Friday and how I probably failed my English paper and then the paper I'm writing now is for my Crim class and ALL MY CLASSES ARE GOING TO BE FAILED AND I AM A FAILURE AND OH MY GOD I'M GOING TO BE LIVING IN MICHIGAN FOR THE SUMMER.

Those are not all related ideas. I am panicking a lot more than I need to about all the things. It is because I am ridiculous also, not sleeping.

And there are so many things in the future that I am looking forward to, I just can't think about them and not panic. Like, celebrating Manda's birthday, funtimes, going to Omaha and getting people to buy me food also Berkshire Hathaway stuff or whatever, funtimes, going on a fucking cruise to Alaska, awesomefuntimes probably, going on a helicopter in Alaska, supercoldfuntimes. See, lots of fun times, but before them, all of the panic and a little bit of the shame/fear that I did super poorly in all of my classes.

Remember, hey guys, remember when, remember the good old days, when I was like, a GOOD student?

So the corner of my poster just fell down a bit, so I got up to fix it and said, "After all this time?" and automatically replied to myself, "Always." And then I couldn't stop laughing as I affixed the poster back to the wall.

I don't, there are no words.

I was doing so well

I have most of my paper done. I have a whole bunch of notes on what I need to say, I have at least half the paper in actual, formal, typed up paragraph form, I have  some ideas started being typed and then left there as paragraph fragments to be picked up and combined and shit.

But now I'm cold and hungry and I don't want to and Tumblr's dead and I have 5 songs on repeat on my iTunes and I don't remember how to things and my hair is suddenly very fascinating how it is able to do things when it is wet and then it dried and stayed that way and now I want to sleep with a pencil in my hair so I can wear it like this, but then I would probably stab myself with it and Christine would be mad that I killed myself with a pencil in my sleep.

Well, maybe someone else would care. I don't know, I would be dead in this scenario.

Anne's totes still awake.

I don't think I have any good snack foods here, so that would kill the go eat food to procrastinate plan.

Well, there are peanuts. I have so many peanuts. I hoard them, possibly in case we get attacked by people who are allergic and then I could throw them and run away while they go into anaphylactic shock.

I just kind of want noodles. :(

How late is too late for potstickers?

I am hungry, man. I first typed hungery, and then I realised that it is 1:16, also that I have to get up tomorrow. Also, tornadoes.

People should use that line more often: "I think it's time we settle our differences. Violently."

I'm hungry

I thought I'd never be hungry again, but I am hungry now and I hate all the things.

Of course, three in the morning would be when I decide to evaluate my life and what I want to do and what kind of job I want and am going to be qualified for and how I am hopeless goddamnit. I have no skills and I am too afraid of people to survive in the world.

Oh man, this unsub is going to kill his sister. That sucks. I'm watching Criminal Minds and knitting, because obviously that will solve all my problems.

I am super psychotic, oh god.

Call me, beep me, if you wanna reach me

DOESN'T MATTER WHERE DOESN'T MATTER WHEN (doesn't matter wheeeen) I WILL BE THERE FOR YOU TILL THE VERY EEEEND. (till the very end!) DANGER OR TROUBLE: I'M THERE ON THE DOUBLE, YOU KNOW THAT YOU ALWAYS CAN CALL KIM POSSIBLE!

Stream of consciousness, how very Modernist of me

When does Supernatural come back? The 16th, fuck no. Fuck that shit. If a narrator never says his/her gender, do I have to keep repeating "the narrator, the narrator?" Can I call the narrator "it" sometimes? Is that disrespectful? Like if you call your baby an it before you know it's gender? Is that bad? Babies, oh god, hormones, bro, babies, you don't understand bro, babies.

I stopped working on this goddamn paper because I have to go to the bathroom, but I don't want to get up because I like sitting down, but I can't work on the paper organizing while I'm distracted by having to go to the bathroom, so I'm not doing anything, except wanting to sing along with this recording of a live Mountain Goats concert event thing. Some of these songs I even know when the audience goes WOOT or like, yells out names of songs that they want to be played but then aren't. Or like, on The Monkey Song, it takes a few bars before they realise what song it is and then once they do they freak out a ton. I mean, yeah, it's the Monkey Song, so I would too, because there's a monkey in the basement.

Nobody even reads these anymore

And what flavor is Squirt supposed to be?

I want eggs.

Or noodles.

damn

I am totes working on my paper

My head hurts. Can I drink Dr. Pepper?

I can't type this paper anymore so I printed out pages with words and then I'm writing more words and then I'm going, huh, words, Dr. Pepper? Bunny Grahams? I have not yet gone out there to get these things, but I am willing them to come to me.

They are not here yet, my magic and willpower is rusty I guess.

So I was looking at my bookmarks

The ones on the computer, not like, my physical bookmarks. Which, by the way, I have not been able to find. If you'll recall, when I was in Florida I was saying how I never found them there, and I have yet to find them. They are probably in books that I took to Florida. NOT THE POINT OF THIS BLOG POST.

A bookmark that I found randomly was this: http://law.justia.com/codes/nebraska/2006/s28index/s2805008000.html 

Do you know what that links to? I do.

2006 Nebraska Code - § 28-508 — Possession of burglar\'s tools; penalty.

Section 28-508
Possession of burglar's tools; penalty.

(1) A person commits the offense of possession of burglar's tools if:

(a) He knowingly possesses any explosive, tool, instrument, or other article adapted, designed, or commonly used for committing or facilitating the commission of an offense involving forcible entry into premises or theft by a physical taking; and

(b) He intends to use the explosive, tool, instrument, or article, or knows some person intends ultimately to use it, in the commission of an offense of the nature described in subdivision (1)(a) of this section.

(2) Possession of burglar's tools is a Class IV felony.

Do you know why I have that bookmarked? It was from over a year ago, when I was doing research on whether or not I could legally purchase lock picks. Apparently I felt it was important enough to bookmark, you know, in case I questioned the legality of my acts later? I don't know.

I just wanted to make a post

British television rules, and they drink pims

I am still hungry.

Where does one purchase a root beer float? This is a genuine question. Please respond via any form of communication that is handy for you. Srsly.

I watched Top Gear and the QI and now I'm watching the Big Fat Quiz of the Year 2010 and it's so great.

I am so hungry

SO HUNGRY. And it is late. And early tomorrow for church. And then I can't even take a nap after church if I want cause we're going to Omaha. Well, I could sleep in the car. I always seem to sleep through the entire drive to Omaha so I don't have a good sense of how long it takes to get there.

Still hungry. Home is stressful.

I JUST HAVE A LOT OF EMOTIONS

You know, like, sometimes I just tear up about Jason Todd in the middle of the night and why would they do that to me JASON.

oh god. oh god oh god oh god. He just, HE WAS BEAT TO DEATH WITH A FUCKING CROWBAR AND THE JOKER AND SO MUCH HATE. weeeeeeeeep

Later that night

   I've been thinking about Jedward guys. (Who are we kidding, I'm always thinking about Jedward.) But seriously, how do they get paid? Like, is separately? Or is it to them both cause it's like they're a band? Do they bother to care about splitting things evenly in half? Cause then they'd have to care about who buys the food and stuff and I'm pretty sure they don't have enough awareness that they are separate people to do that. Can you imagine dating John or Edward and then they would totes pull a Parent Trap and it would be so confusing.

   Also, music, why does it exist. So, you know how like, colors, right? (Also, full sentences are dead.) Music is also numbers and I have music videos on my computer that are just like, wow, and that's why I saved them, and they don't even have to be super professional or whatev the song just has to be like, whoa 500, you know? No, you don't, and I know this and yet I continue to tell you things that pretty much only make sense to me.

   You know what I love? Supernatural. Also nutella. Also Jedward. And My Drunk Kitchen. And Supernatural. Oh and the Oxford comma. Although it doesn't look like I like commas because sentences. You know what I don't like? Things.

  If I take an online MMPI would you want me to tell you the results? Just for kicks and giggles? (That's not the phrase is it? Is it shits and giggles? That sounds more profane than I thought the phrase was though.)

Edit: I took the MMPI. It's over 500 true/false questions. Um, yeah, how am I alive? Ask me about it sometime and I can show you how clinically worrisome I am.

I'MA MAKE A SLEEVE OF BRACELETS

I HAVE AWESOME IDEAS

I made a bracelet like this. Obviously it is not this short and it connects at the ends, but you get the idea. It's striped, these colors.

No, but seriously, why would I ever need alcohol, all I need to do is be awake and the crazies happen and then I watch Secondhand Lions and then I go all I WANT TO HAVE ADVENTURES I COULD KILL PEOPLE AND GET TREASURE AND FIND LOVE AND HAVE A PET LION AND BE HAPPY WHY CAN'T LIFE BE NOT LIKE THIS. That's totes what happens to drunk people, right?

I want to decorate the rest of my walls with pictures and shit from the computer but I'm afraid my printer will be like lolno, bitchplz.

Private I, is watching you, na na na naaa na naaa na na. Do Private I's get badges tho cause that seems sketch.

So, that picture totes isn't correct colors, even though I tried to make them so. I think the red is more a darker blood and the green is more everest than grass and the blue is a little more murky. The yellow seems right though. Youknow, it might be because I'm in the cave and can't see the bracelet that well because dark.

Haley Joel Osment, Emily Osment's older brother, adorable little kid that sees dead people, you know him, he was such a great child actor. Then he stopped acting and got older and now his sister is all, adorbs, even if she is on Hannah Montana.

MUSIC IS SO GREAT THO. NOT HANNAH MONTANA MUSIC, BUT MUSIC, YOU KNOW THE MUSICAL KIND. Personally I'm a big fan of the music that feels all, dark red, sometimes the purple sparkly music. Or the tinny blue. BITCH PLEASE OF COURSE MUSIC HAS COLORS WHAT DO YOU TAKE ME FOR A FOOL? Hannah Montana music is bright pink and I disapprove. (Tho she does get the best of both worlds, if by both worlds you mean acting and singing like a child slave/star.)

wat is this i am not good with computer

gpoy

Have you ever been so tired that life is all

But then suddenly a sense of clarity hits you and then